Short update, practically stream-of-consciousness, but something I felt worthy of sharing.
I was just heading home from work, wrapping up a nearly 15-hour day. I was exhausted, in a terrible mood, frustrated with something I was working on, and felt like I was half dead from the sleep deprivation, extremely high stress and horrible eating habits that are a normal part of my daily routine.
Note the use of the past tense.
I was thinking back to one time when I was particularly happy and telling one of my friends how happy I was, and that everyone had the capacity to be happy inside them, and that it was simply a choice they had to make.
I started thinking about that and I realized, dammit, I was really onto something. Happiness IS a choice. It’s a decision. One that’s too important to be left to other people or the events that shape our lives. Happiness is the most important thing you’ve got, so why in the world would you cede control of something so important to anything outside yourself?
I closed my eyes, sighed, flexed all the muscles in my body, took in a deep breath, sat up a little straighter and smiled. That was all it took to shake the horrors of the day away. I decided that I’d rather be happy than brood over what a shitty day I had.
Brooding isn’t productive. Brooding is consciously rubbing your nose in what you don’t like feeling. I’ve *never* come out better after brooding over something negative. In fact, it only prolongs what I wanted to forget. In light of that… good god, why am I doing that to myself? So I stopped, and I’m happy now.
Happiness is a choice. Make it.